Interesting Ways of Measuring Your Life

In a recent interview, Slajov Žižek told Big Think

“For a long time, I behaved as if I was still young, like the future was ahead of me. I was never a so-called mature normal person. All of a sudden [I went] from pretending to be young to discovering, oh my God, I’m in late 50s… I hate this. I’m now like the proverbial woman who celebrates her 39th birthday five times in a row. I realized I cannot pretend that I will have time to do the big work. If I don’t do it now, what I really want to do, I will never do it.”

This really grabbed ahold of me because, for the past several years I have been thinking of myself as still in my early to mid 50′s, and, at times, even in my 40′s. The fact is I am almost 63 … there is A LOT less life ahead of me than there is behind me. As Žižek said, I can no longer pretend that I will have the time to do the big work, unless I do it NOW.

It struck me then that one way of measuring our lives, and planning them out, is to look at “what percentage” of our lives has already gone. Of course we cannot know the exact percentage, and most of you probably haven’t even crossed the half-way mark, yet. But, it can be useful to think about it, as one possible life measure and as a possible motivator.

David Foster Wallace had an additional way of looking at percentages and life. As he once told David Lipsky: “writing Broom of the System felt like it was using 97 percent of me, whereas the philosophy thesis was using 50 percent of me.” That is, he felt that writing fiction was the best use of who he was. (Quoted from Lipsky, David (2010-03-31). Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself: A Road Trip with David Foster Wallace (p. 261). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition.)

That is, Dave Wallace apparently asked himself, at least subconsciously, how much of my talent (and everything else that is me) is being used by this activity, versus this activity, versus this activity … It seems to me to be a very sensible, and important question, for anyone to ask. At any age.

If you haven’t recently looked at your life in these “percentage contexts,” I submit to you that doing so will be worth your time.

A few bites a day can make the difference between weight loss and weight gain.

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Reasons Why Our Reasoning Ain’t So Good

Thousands if not millions of hours of psychological research has given us a superabundance of books that explain how we make decisions and why many of them are so poor. Books like Subliminal, Thinking, Fast and Slow, and Predictably Irrational tell us that the more instinctual parts of our brains handle the bulk of our thinking, leaving the really hard decisions to the more rational (and less-evolved) sub-brain.

Still, as Jonathan Haidt has observed, none of these books seem to really answer the question “why are humans so amazingly bad at reasoning in some contexts, and so amazingly good in others?” Summarizing a theory by Mercier and Sperber, Haidt goes on to say:

Reasoning was not designed to pursue the truth. Reasoning was designed by evolution to help us win arguments. That’s why they call it The Argumentative Theory of Reasoning. So, as they put it, “The evidence reviewed here shows not only that reasoning falls quite short of reliably delivering rational beliefs and rational decisions. It may even be, in a variety of cases, detrimental to rationality. Reasoning can lead to poor outcomes, not because humans are bad at it, but because they systematically strive for arguments that justify their beliefs or their actions. This explains the confirmation bias, motivated reasoning, and reason-based choice, among other things.

Wow! That explains better than anything I’ve seen why teams can be so good at solving problems, and why even geniuses can do poorly when tackling problems totally by themselves. I’ve seen good argumentation within dozens and dozens of teams have positive problem-solving results, while seeing some really sharp folks get overwhelmed by a problem from not questioning their assumptions.

I don’t know that knowing this is going to make us change, so that we become better at using reason to solve problems instead of just to win arguments. But, maybe knowing it will help us to at least occasionally use our brains better.

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A Screwtape Letter on How to Waste Your Life

Many, many years ago, I read a couple of C.S. Lewis books that had such an impact on me that I occasionally re-read them: The Screwtape Letters and The Great Divorce.

The Screwtape Letters are a series of fictional letters sent from a leading demon in hell to a young demon on earth, one who is still learning the nuances of capturing the souls of humans. You may alternately read it as the impact that one’s subconscious can have on the conscious.

Anyway, in recently re-reading portions of The Screwtape Letters, I came across the following:

As the uneasiness and his reluctance to face it cut him off more and more from all real happiness, and as habit renders the pleasures of vanity and excitement and flippancy at once less pleasant and harder to forgo (for that is what habit fortunately does to a pleasure) you will find that anything or nothing is sufficient to attract his wandering attention. You no longer need a good book, which he really likes, to keep him from his prayers or his work or his sleep; a column of advertisements in yesterday’s paper will do. You can make him waste his time not only in conversation he enjoys with people whom he likes, but in conversations with those he cares nothing about on subjects that bore him. You can make him do nothing at all for long periods. You can keep him up late at night, not roistering, but staring at a dead fire in a cold room. All the healthy and out-going activities which we want him to avoid can be inhibited and nothing given in return, so that at least he may say, as one of my own patients said on his arrival down here, ‘I now see that I spent most of my life in doing neither what I ought nor what I liked.’

It amazes me that this 60-year old satire (originally published in 1941) says so much about today: how Facebook, Twitter, TV, the “interwebs,” … distract to the point that we wind up accomplishing zip-squat.

It angers me that our world has come to this. Will we now begin devolve, instead of further evolving?

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Are You Hiding Action Items from Yourself?

A problem I’ve noticed in my use of information collection tools such as Evernote, SpringPad, and SimpleNote is that I sometimes bury action items within them. For example, in reading an interview of Jeff Bezos, I used Evernote to capture the following:

Bezos says he doesn’t think defensively. “Everything we do is driven by seeing opportunity rather than being worried about defending,” he says.

My reason for capturing this is that I believe that I am not opportunistic enough, and thought that occasionally seeing Bezos’ statement might help motivate me to be more opportunistic.

Hear the buzzer going off? Yep: what I should have done instead (or in addition) is add a “Be More Opportunistic” to my Goals or or schedule time on a weekly basis to look for opportunities.

If you are capturing a lot of information, chances are some of it has worthwhile action items for you, items that might belong in one of your GTD lists.

(By the way, I don’t recall the source of the Bezos interview or I would link to it for you. I believe he’s said something similar in many forums, though.)

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Resources for David Foster Wallace Fans

My recent David Foster Wallace post focused on his 2005 Kenyon Commencement Speech, but also provided several links to additional DFW resources. Since that posting, I have read more of David’s material, along with interviews, fan letters, and other pieces related to this fascinating writer, and thought it worthwhile to share some of this material with you.

The format I have chosen for sharing these resources for DFW fans is a SpringPad Notebook:

I thought about sharing it in Evernote, but SpringPad seems better suited to this sort of thing, and I think it’s interface is just more classy than Evernote’s. (While I continue to use Evernote, a lot of “geeks” prefer alternatives.)

Of course I will update this SpringPad notebook as I come across other interesting DFW material.

Update: I decided to also share via Evernote: David Foster Wallace Notebook on Evernote.

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A Ton of Online Resources for Learning

Regular readers know that, even though I am retired, I am big on continuous learning. I make it a point to learn something every day. (I’ve seen an interview in which Warren Buffett says he tries to learn something every day, which offers some evidence that I am not insane. At least not for the reason of trying to be a constant learner.)

And, whenever I find really good resources for learning, I try to share them with you. Last night I somehow came upon this AskReddit post which has about a gazillion good answers to the question of “what online resources are good for intellectual stimulation?” I highly recommend that you check it out, and pick out some resources for regular visiting. It’s an excellent listing of learning resources, covering a huge assortment of topics.

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Save Money on these Notetaker Items. If You Want To.

When I broke the pen in my David Allen Notetaker Wallet, which I’ve had for over 10 years, I went to David’s online store to look for a replacement. The store had two models of the Notetaker pen, one for about $30 and one for about $20. (See here for David’s store.)

Just for the heck of it, I decided to see if Amazon had either pen. Sure enough, Amazon had the $30 pen for about $7, which I promptly ordered and now use regularly. I noticed that Amazon also had discounts on the Notetaker wallet itself, but I really don’t need a new one at this time.

Not everyone likes to buy the cheaper version of a product, though. For example, some might observe that David Allen, while a millionaire, is not a billionaire like Jeff Bezos is, and they might decide to help the one most in need by buying from David.

And, some people buy based on religious factors. I don’t know the religion of either Mr. Allen or Mr. Bezos, but I’ve noticed that some of David’s writing has an air of Eastern mysticism, while I would imagine that Jeff considers only himself to be god. So, again, those who buy based on religious conviction might prefer to buy from David.

Some might also say to themselves “Ya know, I sure have benefitted a lot from David Allen’s GTD techniques, and I want to reward him for his teaching by always buying GTD products from him.” So, again, Jeff gets left out in the cold.

But of course there are those like me who wind up buying through Mr. Bezos. It does take all kinds, doesn’t it?

Disclaimer 1: I am an Amazon affiliate. This year alone, in just five months, I have made an astounding $38.27 from Amazon affiliate sales. So, if you want to buy the pen from Amazon, but you want to keep Amazon from giving me a referral fee, you can just go into Amazon and search for the pen. That doesn’t save you any money, but if you don’t like me, then it’s a way of ensuring that I don’t continue to stack up such phenomenal profits.

Disclaimer 2: The prices mentioned herein are subject to possible change, since I don’t control the pricing.

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How Email, Twitter, Facebook Can Keep You From Dying

All across the world, and especially the US, nursing homes and hospice centers are overflowing with people who just will not die. They are saying

I can’t die yet! I’ve still got unread email and tweets and Facebook messages!

Sound a bit Twighlight-Zonish to you? Hum … well … can you say there’s no truth in it at all?

Regardless, we all know for sure that email and Twitter and Facebook devour a good chunk of our lives these days. And, we all know we could do something about it. If we wanted to. Specifically, as Harvard professor Steven Pinker said in an NYT article last year:

Yes, the constant arrival of information packets can be distracting or addictive, especially to people with attention deficit disorder. But distraction is not a new phenomenon. The solution is not to bemoan technology but to develop strategies of self-control, as we do with every other temptation in life. Turn off e-mail or Twitter when you work, put away your Blackberry at dinner time, ask your spouse to call you to bed at a designated hour.

Or, in non-Harvard-speak: “Just exercise some willpower! Geez!”

Turns out that exercising willpower can work very well, as Peter Bregman describes in his recent Harvard Business Review article: he reduced his email time from 6 hours per day to 3, just by exercising the willpower to only interact with email at selected times.

I’ve seen it work, too. When my son and his family visit, I watch them set around with their smartphones in their faces for a most of the weekend, while they check email, Twitter, Facebook, and of course, play games. But, when my brother visits, I can hear his email alerts for maybe a dozen times an hour, and yet he doesn’t bother looking at them: he focuses on the visit.

Of course my Dad had a good bit of willpower, and I seem to remember that most people of his generation did. The willpower gene seemed to skip me, and my son, and my grandkids, though, although it did not skip my brother. Perhaps my brother is just the rare exception (along with Peter Bregman and Steven Pinker), and the rest of us are a bunch of pussies because that’s the way the genetics worked out.

Or, perhaps we cannot legitimately blame lack of willpower on genetics, and will have to face the possibility that It Is Up To Us whether we exercise willpower or not. Scary, huh?

Or maybe it’s our survival instinct, which tells us that, as long as we have unread email, we will keep ourselves from dying.

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Good Fiction Books Can Improve Your Mindfulness

I recently read an article suggesting that reading fiction is good for you. While it made good points, my initial reaction was “I see plenty of fiction on TV, including the presidential debates and all the other political nonsense from both parties.”

But, a few days later I came upon a philosopher’s blog and read a post in which he talked about the science fiction books that he liked to read, and how it helped his imagination and thinking overall.

So, I bought a few of the science fiction books he recommended, and the Hunger Games Trilogy, and Monday Mornings: a Novel. Then I got into a few of David Foster Wallace’s books/essays. This binge reminded that there are mediocre authors (Monday Mornings), really good authors (Hunger Games), and outstanding authors (David Foster Wallace). And of course there are some really pathetic ones, too (much of the science fiction fit this mold).

I did find that all of these fiction excursions exercised my imagination better than TV, though. Books have a way of letting your imagination work at its own pace, rather than the advertising-driven pace of TV. And books can, properly written, help you become more mindful. DFW’s works are especially good at this, because he takes little things and talks about them with lots of fascinating, well-done detail. As I noted in a recent post, one of his friends once remarked that David had “more frames per second than the rest of us,” and that really shows in his writing. It can make you want to be more observant, to be more a part of the life that you are living and partly experiencing. Neuroscience tells us that our brains process billions of bits of information each day, but we are only consciously aware of a very small percentage of it.

Hence, in a way, good fiction can, like meditation, help you better experience life.

Of course, I should note that there are those who have religious objections to the use of imagination and/or meditation. I shit you not. The website The Berean Call appears to have such objections. Personally, had I not come upon that article, I could never have imagined that anyone could be so narrow-minded. (Sarcastic pun intended.) Perhaps they need to read more fiction to open their minds up a bit.

Anyway, something for you to think about. I can tell you that I had gotten into a major rut of reading only non-fiction books, books I thought would help me become a better person. And, the sad fact is, most of those books say the same thing over and over, and half of it, even though it is supposed to be non-fiction, is pure BS. If you have fallen into the same rut, some good fiction might help you gain a new perspective.

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Instead of Fighting “Normal,” Model Genius [Mindfulness]

Have you noticed the plethora of books and articles being written on how irrational, emotional, and easy-to-trick the human mind is? There are books like Predictably Irrational, Thinking, Fast and Slow, and How We Decide, and it seems like every other day there is an article like Your brain is not as rational as you may think it is and Messing with memory.

And, if that weren’t enough to make us feel insecure, we have our own personal experiences that make us realize we are not the perfectly rational creatures that centuries of philosophers described us to be. I had an incident this morning that ties right in with the Freakonomics article on messing with memory. My best friend and I had agreed to meet for breakfast, but when I went to where I thought we were to meet, he wasn’t there. I thought about it, and pictured his email in my mind as saying “Let’s do Cassie’s since we haven’t been there in a while.” I was at Cassie’s … he wasn’t. A little later he called me, and said at “I’m at the World’s Best Diner waiting on you.” I questioned whether his email had said WBD instead of Cassie’s, and he said it had.

Turns out, he was right: his email had said WBD, but I thought I read Cassie’s. So here’s the thing: we don’t remember what we saw, we remember what we thought we saw. Of course, the Freakonomics article goes into problems even beyond that, such as changing memories.

Anyway, I put this out of my head for a while to do some reading about David Foster Wallace. In David Lipsky’s book about DFW, he noted that someone had said of David that “He had more frames per second than the rest of us, he just never stopped. He was just constantly devouring the universe.” I had gathered exactly that from his writing, and also from some interviews (search for Charlie Rose David Foster Wallace Youtube, for example). I also concluded that, in addition to having more frames per second (being a better observer), he also thought more deeply about everything than most of us do. And, as I thought about it, it seemed to me that the genius of Richard Feynman could be talked about in much the same way.

Then it occurred to me that we should see research being done on how to be more like DFW and RPF. We should learn how to observe better and to reflect more on what we observe. That is, we should learn how to better be where we are, and to exercise mindfulness as our normal state of being, instead of a rare meditative state. I suspect that, if we could do that, we could throw away all the other self-help books.

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